King Lear; The Good, The Bad, and the Hilarious

Well, I think it’s time to introduce you all to the glamorous and slightly insane world of a Shakespearean director.
Okay, I lie.
It’s insanely mental, but not at all glamorous.
Here is a little peep-hole view of the strange and colorful world of thespians and the relationship between the directors and the directed.


Hayley: …And they couldn’t get the pool balls out of their mouths, so they had to go to the hospital and have their jaws dislocated.
Kent: I saw this guy put an eight ball in his mouth and--Huwegh! Swallow it--and then (da da da daa) regurgitate it!

King Lear: Howl, howl—I don’t have to howl four times, right? Look, look a mouse!

Hayley: Albany, you’re a frustrated duke, not a flustered housewife.

Hayley: Can you say that line with more…um, can you say it less, eh, hum…can you (waves hands vaguely)…you know…

Other director: Trail behind—
Hayley: Walk in front—
Other director: More sorrow.
Hayley: Laugh.
Other director: Step forward.
Hayley: Step back.

Hayley: Where’s Gloucester? And Cornwall. And Regan. And Goneril. And Albany.—Albany’s at home you say? Well, then, somebody call him up and ask him why he’s not here.
King Lear: Hi Albany, what were you planning on doing this afternoon? (Pause) Science fair project? (Glances nervously over at steaming director) Well—
Hayley: Tell him to come over now and I’ll help him finish his science project when we’re done. (Hayley grimaces. This is the ultimate sacrifice, as she hates science projects more than words can express.)

Hayley: So you’ll want to weave in front of Cordelia and behind Kent, over Lear and under Regan, twirl around Goneril all the while looking cynical, then step twice to the left and side step Cornwall (now you're jesting, but afraid. Terrified, yet jovial), jump forward twice and barely miss knocking into Gentleman number one, who you must give time to slip you a note, before you exit upstage left. Got that?

Here are some things I have learned:

1. Give a boy a sword and we’ll wander off the point, never to be recalled again.
2. A dead person is distracting.
3. Arguments happen, and when they do they must be speedily resolved with prayer. Otherwise you’re sunk.
4. When two people die in close proximity to one another it’s very difficult to keep it all from looking awkward.
5. A director with giggles is about as helpful as a toothbrush with no bristles.
6. The words director and perfectionist can never go in the same sentence.
7. It’s very sad when you decide you want to act, and wear a pretty dress, but know that you’ll end up backstage in black.
8. You must somehow go with the flow, all the while keeping a grip on the rudder.
9. Shakespeare talks too much.
10. It’s different, but not disagreeable, to shine through other people.

Anyways, I'm having a good time for the most part, and content with knowing I'm building character for the rest. We still need lots of prayer, so if you thought of it and you felt like shooting a quick one to God, it would be much appreciated. I desire this play to be all for His glory--gory deaths, drawn-out, slightly boring monologues, and all.

Numa Numa and The Screwtape Letters

I have the Numa Numa song stuck in my head. If you don’t know what I’m talking about, go to youtube and type in the words 'Numa Numa'.
Then you will know the song.
Unfortunately, my having this song stuck in my head is not a good thing for the rest of you. It's rather an odd song and tends to turn my brain to mush.

Wow, lots of things have been going on lately, which is the reason there haven't been many blogs of late. Which is sad. I would like to thank those people that enjoy reading my blogs by writing more blogs, not less.

Since my last blog (wow, I've said the word 'blog' a lot, sorry.) I’ve been to visit Messiah and Whitworth (in PA and WA respectively) and still don’t know where I’m going. Sigh. God, if you could just paint a big red X on the college you want me to go to, I’d be much obliged. I’ve also been procrastinating about my science project and am now reaping the consequences. King Lear, that long-winded old man, is coming along, but I just may go crazy before we actually get it on stage. “Go after her, she’s desperate.” -------Duke of Albany
And then my birthday is coming up, and I, Hayley Huber, will be eighteen.

Here’s a list of famous people and the things they did when they were eighteen.

Cleopatra was the Queen of Egypt.
George Washington was surveyor of Culpepper County.
Elisha Wood began his role as Frodo in The Lord of the Rings.
Mozart was employed as the court musician by the Prince of Salzburg.

Hmm. I wonder if there are any kingdoms open? Any eligible princes.

Also, God has been revealing Himself to me through Screwtape, from The Screwtape Letters by C.S. Lewis. I aspire to be like Lewis. He not only understood human nature, he understood how to write about it so that others could understand it. While I read, I’m constantly saying, “Hey! That’s exactly how I feel/think/act, but I thought I was the only one who felt/thought/acted that way. Weird. But nice. I’m not as mental as I thought I was.” And more than understanding and depicting human thought and emotion, Lewis understood God to a strong degree. He was able to use his amazing writing prowess to convey this knowledge to those who haven’t yet climbed as far up the godly ladder as he has.
Darn it. I’ve been asked twice in the past two weeks who my heroes are (for college interviews) and I couldn’t for the life of me come up with and answer (well, I did eventually, but only after much perspiring). C.S. Lewis! Duh!
Anyways, I encourage you all to read The Screwtape Letters. It’s a really short read, but it’s really good. And now I must leave you, because my eyes are being fried by the screen.

A Tribute

I just wanted to take a moment and write a tribute to a topic (subject, theme, idea) near and dear to my heart.

Friends.
I like them.
They’re one of God’s neatest inventions and He has recently been blessing me with an amazing bunch of them.

Some of them are braver than me, and they challenge me and encourage me to step out and be bold in my faith or in other areas of my life. Some of them are at my level and we can work together, encouraging one another because we totally and completely understand what the other is going through. Some of them I can help. Some of them are nuts and when we part company my stomach muscles hurt from laughing and my cheeks from smiling. Some of them are like me and it’s really exciting to discover the crazy ways in which we’re similar. Some of them aren’t at all like me and discerning what makes them tick is awfully exciting. Some of them are “cluster friends” and I meet with them in groups. Some of them are my “loner friends” and we hang out by ourselves. Some of them are constantly introducing me to new friends. Some of them make me think. Some of them give me a welcome break from thinking. Some of them are my age. Some of them are not. Some share my beliefs while others have worldviews that don’t align with mine (teaching me it’s possible to love those I don’t agree with).

All of them are a gift from God. All of them were put in my life for a reason. All of them have blessed me. And I wanted to thank you all. Thanks. I love you guys!